What the hell is wrong with us? We’ve made porn into a billion dollar industry, we put sex into everything from fast food advertisements to family TV shows, we allow our daughters to idolize teenage pop stars who dress like hookers and sing about fornication; we are a culture that is permissive, hyper sexual and overtly hedonistic, yet, in spite of all of this, BREASTFEEDING is somehow offensive to us. We suffer from a special brand of insanity, so unique that it needs its own name: Progressive Puritanism. For the most part we carry on like we’re living in Sodom or Gomorrah, but if someone goes really crazy and decides to feed their child in sight of other humans, all of the sudden we turn into Victorian prudes. It doesn’t make any sense.
In the last few days I’ve seen a few stories dealing with the “controversy” surrounding breastfeeding in public. A woman down in Texas was lectured about “decency” by staff at a rec center when she fed her infant while watching her older daughter’s dance class. Another incident happened on an American Airlines flight where a mother was shamed by the flight attendant for discreetly feeding her baby on the plane. I guess she should have taken her provocative display of child-feeding into the 2×2 foot bathroom where people go to dispel feces from their rectum, because this is totally the same thing.
OK. A few thoughts on the “issue” of breastfeeding:
1) Breastfeeding isn’t sexual. If you see it that way, you’ve got issues. Like, serious issues. Like, you-should-probably-be-on-a-registry type of issues. I actually had someone tell me today that women shouldn’t feed their kids in public for the same reason they shouldn’t conceive their kids in public. This is to draw a direct parallel between breastfeeding and sex. Again, issues. Serious issues.
2) I’ve encountered breastfeeding moms in public. Not once — NOT ONCE — have they ever ripped their shirt off and run through a crowd screaming: “Look at me! Look at this! I’m breastfeeding!!!” I’ve never seen that happen. I’m willing to bet I’ve never seen it because it’s literally never occurred in the history of the universe. I’ve also never had a young mother pull out a gun and yell: “You will watch me breastfeed or I’ll blow your brains out! WATCH OR DIE!” In other words, I’ve never been “forced” to “watch” a woman breastfeed. The way these prudes talk about it, you’d think they were being compelled to observe against their will. Personally, when I come across a woman breastfeeding, I think, “Oh OK, a mother is feeding her kid. Cool, anyway now I’ll get back to carrying on with my own existence.”
3) What exactly is so offensive about breastfeeding? Is it the amount of breast exposed? It’s hard for me to take that objection seriously. Right now, as we speak, there are millions of dads out there letting their daughters leave the house wearing outfits that are DESIGNED to highlight, expose, and sexualize that part of the body. Maybe we should reserve our condemnation for that, rather than moms who do what God intended moms to do. But, if we must have this conversation, how much of the forbidden zone is actually exposed when a mom has a child at her breast? Not much, really. If she’s just an exhibitionist she’d be better off wearing a bikini top, or even a thousand other types of tops and shirts that some women wear to their office jobs on a daily basis.
What kind of message does it send when we tell mothers to hide in dark corners or cover themselves in burlap if they wish to provide natural nutrients to their offspring? We know what the message is: Breastfeeding is gross, shameful, embarrassing. I especially enjoy the grown men who suddenly become squeamish school boys when the topic turns to breastfeeding. “Eeeeewwww, get it away from me! It’s weeeeeird!”
Good Lord. Grow up, people.
With the strange paradox of our permissive sexual attitudes contrasted with our uptight whining about breastfeeding, I shudder to think about what other inconsistencies I might find in the public psyche should I dig deeper. I mean, hell, next you’re gonna tell me that in a country where millions take prescription narcotics, we still won’t allow cancer patients to smoke marijuana in most states.
Screw it. I give up.
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I am a mom and I totally support breastfeeding. Although, I have to say I have seen it all. I once saw a Muslim woman in public transportation, completely covered in one of those head-scarf/dress coveralls, with her boob out, breastfeeding, and talking on her cellphone. I’m not saying that she shouldn’t have been doing that, I’m just saying that the contrast was slightly shock-worthy.
My name is Kim and I endorse this entire message. Hihihi.
Your point was well covered- no need to say more but everyone has…So sad that many don’t get it. I have seen so many examples of hypocrisy. Parents encourage and allow so many sexist, inappropriate conversations, activities- underage drinking, sexualized talk and dress of young girls – for example, and yet breast feeding is wrong. Some people are so weird about it they say eew to it in private too. Anyway, I suppose like you I give up trying to prove the point, people are divided and many of them are just wrong!
Most of the time I agree with you Matt, but not on this one. I am a mother of two and I don’t want to see it. Put it away! Many corporations now have mother’s rooms and it is best to take advantage of any privacy that is provided.
Brittney…this is so sad coming from a woman…shame on you. I would like to take all the women with there breasts hanging out and tell them they need to go to that private room you were talking about. They are exposing their breasts for sexual reasons…which we all know we go to a room for that fun..I am sure you wouldn’t ask a woman who is feeding her child with a bottle to go to a private room. Purely ignorant.
Shame on her? What is wrong with you??? She gave her opinion and wasn’t insulting to anyone! Why do you have to attack HER instead of her idea? Because she’s a woman, she immediately must think like you do? “Disgusted is my name” is right. You’re disgusting. Do the internet a favor and shut up.
Thank you no name! That is exactly right, just because others have different opinions is no reason to go calling their fitness as a woman or a mother into question!
Disgusting you are. She is entitled to her opinion. I am a Mom, and I do not want to see an exposed breast or nipple in public. Cover it up or excuse yourself. Again, my opinion.
You’re entitled to an opinion, sure, even ones that make you sound like an idiot. I saw more disgusting things like women with shorts barely longer than their vulva and tube tops barely covering nipples and that was at Disney yesterday. Frankly the nursing room was the most discreet building there! I hope none of your virgin eyes watched the VMAs.
Here’s an idea Brittney: You don’t wanna see it? Look the other way! OMG, it’s that easy!! If it bothers you that much, how about you go in the mothers room. Then you can be all by yourself… which you probably should be, you judgmental bitch.
Hey moron – she wasn’t being judgmental; you were. You’re the bitch. She gave her opinion. It was reasoned and intelligent. It also wasn’t insulting. Essentially the exact opposite of you.
I feel sad for your children Brittney. Do you take them to the zoo at all? I certainly hope all those mother mammals have the decency to nurse their nurslings in private away from your puritan eyes. Breast milk is the absolute perfect food for babies, their little bodies were designed to utilize the nutrients completely, I understand that not everyone wants to or can breastfeed, and I’m not at all offended when you pull out your bottle of similac to feed your baby so you don’t get to question me on how I feed my baby. Stay in the privacy of your own home if it’s so offensive. I’m sure you don’t have TV, because for anyone who is so offended by breastfeeding certainly wouldn’t want to risk seeing a boob on TV.
If you don’t want to see it, then don’t look. What you personally want doesn’t enter into it (unless this is all about you; is it? did i miss something?). Great about those corporations. I’m sure there’s a corporate boob room right next to the park where my kids play.
I’m with Brittney! And I was a nursing mother. She didn’t say that breastfeeding is disgusting, but rather implied that it is a private thing. While I certainly do support and applaud nursing, even in public, there is such a thing as modesty. It is especially more convenient to be covered when there are so many “distractions” (including giggling boys and teens). My breasts are a part of my private body, not to be exposed or “hanging out” in public, even when nursing my baby.
Once again shame shame on you Susan….especially since you were a nursing mom…it is not my fault that bottle fed children or giggling boys and teens are not taught that we are actually made to produce milk and feed our babies…I do not care about teens or giggling boys…it is a shame you do….you could be teaching them that the breast is more than just a tool for men to get off on. Unfortunately you were to scared to do that…..HELLO moms out there…teach your sons about nursing precious children. Teach your beautiful girls the value of breast feeding your baby and the benefits…bonding, health…I can go on forever. Modesty…lord….private parts…gosh are you two? So don’t let your boob hang out…nurse your child…no one said you have to walk around with your “private part” hanging out…I have never seen anyone walk around with there private part dangling around…saying here child here is my private part now suckle…geesh grow up. Perves will always be perves…and who cares about them…you can be fully clothed from head to toe and in there eyes you are naked…it doesn’t matter….EDUCATE THE CHILDREN!
Many children, including my own, refuse to nurse under any sort of covering. It is unreasonable to expect mothers to basically stay home just in case their infant needs to eat while they are out and about. Be as discreet as you feel comfortable with, and don’t look down on other mother’s who don’t share the same convictions as you, or who are unable to cover up as much as you would like them to. Like many have responded to you: If it bothers you so much, look the other way.
and how exactly do you think those boys and teens got to be that way? My 11 year old does not giggle when someone is breastfeeding- unless he’s close enough to see the adorable “milk drunk” sleepy baby. Why doesn’t he giggle? Because he knows what breasts are for!
Children who grow up around breastfeeding mom do not think anything of it. It’s completely normal to them and they mind their own business. If we continue in a society where we cover up when nursing and shield children from the breast’s natural function, we will stay this way (or get worse) FOREVER.
For this to stop, children need to be taught what a breast is for and the easiest way for them to learn is to see it in every day life and treated like a perfectly normal thing.
A baby eating is NOT a private thing. Next time you go to the restaurant, could you kindly take your meal into the bathroom? I find it offensive to see you eating! Besides all women that I’ve seen breastfeeding in public have always been modest. Most even have a blanket over their babies head. Oh…I guess I’d be OK with you doing that in a restaurant too. Enjoy your meal under your blankie!
I totally support breastfeeding. I was unable to breastfeed my son in public, because he has a sensory issue and needed to be in a quiet, dark, noise free room or he threw fits. And he nursed constantly. It was very isolating. I don’t know how I didn’t give up and start giving him formula, but I am sure glad I didn’t because it turns out that he is also lactose and soy intolerant. When he got a little older, I was able to nurse more publicly, and he could tolerate it. I tried covering up a few times, and let me tell you, that was immodest. He would unlatch, throw the cover, expose me and make a scene. If I didn’t use a cover and exposed as little as possible, he latched on and covered me completely himself.
Nope. Not private. Because eating is not private.
What’s with all the “shame on you” nonsense? Is “Shame on you for disagreeing with me” what you mean to say? How about shame on you for refusing to respect someone else’s personal convictions?
George, I assume you’re a man, so I expect less from you, the shame is these women perpetuating the nonsense that breast feeding is somehow dirty or shameful and should only be done in ‘private’ when bottle feeding is completely accepted practice everywhere. Is this really a ‘conviction’ for you, surely you have better things to be so contrite about! Feeding a baby the way God and nature intended is no shameful or should be hidden, it should be none of your business! Go back to your computer porn and tell me I should be embarrassed about feeding my child in public!
If a mother’s room was available to me I would probably WANT to go use it to breastfeed my child. Nice quiet environment vs loud annoying public space? No question about it.
Do I applaud women for breastfeeding their children? Yup sure do. But do I think some modesty is called for as well? Yup, I sure do. If as in the above post I don’t want to see anyone’s trashy teenaged daughter flaunting it all, making them full of milk & attached to a baby is not going to change my mind about wanting to see somebody else’s breasts hanging out. I don’t want to see ANYONE’s breasts, buttocks, or genitals. Period. You say “I don’t have to watch” but what is seen cannot be unseen, even if you then turn away.
If you don’t want to go to a nursing room, or use a blanket they DO make discreet nursing shirts these days. I can’t remember the blog title now, but the author was a woman who was breastfeeding. They were trying out a “new” type of nursing t-shirt & she had her husband take a pic of them using it in public. If that woman hadn’t said she was breastfeeding I never would have know she was, it was that concealed.
So go forth & breastfeed, but use common sense and stop acting like rabid foaming at the mouth crazies if others don’t want to see your naked breasts. Breast milk is not a golden ticket or a magic pass to slam on other’s views regarding this subject. Neither Brittney nor Susan are bad moms because they felt like modesty was the way to go. In fact YOU are a bad “mother” if you make other moms feel inadequate because they are trying to be discreet. It makes them feel uncomfortable & less likely to breastfeed because now they are not only afraid people “calling them out” for breastfeeding (discreetly) but maybe they will also be called out by people like you for being “ashamed” to bare it all.
Thank you, JennyG. That is one of the most reasonable comments I’ve read in the on-going debate over breastfeeding. As a future mother who wants to breastfeed, I know one thing for sure – I’m going to stay off the comment sections of “mommy blogs” in the future and just call my own mom. I don’t think I could take the constant criticism and judgment of the “mommy warriors.” I’ve seen too many friends struggle with guilt over whether they were being good mothers because of these types of “shame-on-you” tirades. True, it happens in real life as well, but for some reason, it seems worse in the faceless, concentrated world of online communities.
Right on! I totally agree. I’m not completely comfortable breastfeeding in public, and mostly it has to do with the way I think others will perceive me. It’s ridiculous, and I’m totally working on getting over it. Breasts are biologically designed to provide nutrients to small humans. Breastfeeding IS the natural function. It should be the sexualization of them that gets us all uncomfortable and up in arms.
Amen! I lobe everythin u had to say! I think next time a lady is ask to feed their child in the bathroom, they should say ” ill feed my child in the bathroom if u go n eat your food in the bathroom first!” “Oh wait you won’t well neither will I there is no differance!” I’m one of those ppl who r quite modest n I ry to cover up as much a poss but when I do feed my son, I get this look on my face say something I dare u, u will get belittled wit the baby on the boob! Ha! Take that for not feedin in public lol also I want to say lf breast feedin is not okay in public then y is okay to eat in public? Also I wouod like to say that I really like what u had to say wit all the half naked bimbo walkin around n yet breast feedin is not okay! N also its okay to idolize half naked bimbos but yet breast feedin isn’t okay……. when did it become okay to formula feed ur child? N then Society wounders y more then half of the us populationI is obese jus sayin, u really don’t see breastfeed kids in that category!
This post gave me cancer
Jacquelyn. I have no idea what you said, because reading your post was miserable. First, learn the English language and how to spell it.
Wow. I can never understand why such hatred pops out for no reason. There was absolute no reason for these last 2 replies.to jacquelyn`s post. Show some love, or at least understanding.
Kat; you have a strange sense of hatred. No hatred involved in my comment. Just constructive criticism. If your going to make public comments, use correct language and spell out your words. Save your u, ppl, y, n, lol for texts to friends.
Jack, it’s “you’re”. If you are going to criticize someone’s grammar, get yours right.
“Your” = belonging to
“You’re” =you are.
I can’t believe this is still being debated…wow….
If you’re going to criticize my grammar, you should take your own advise. “You’re” is for “you are”. “Your” is possessive, meaning it belongs to you. I used the correct word, just as you did when you wrote yours. Maybe you were just so ready to criticize that you didn’t take the time to read my comment, or maybe you don’t know the difference. Either way; isn’t it great fun that we get to have these conversations with people we don’t even know?
My email led me to beleive your comment was on my first comment. After I posted, I saw your comment was on my second comment and you are correct. I did use the wrong form. I should take more time to read my own posts.
So ready to criticize you didn’t read your own post? I accept your apology.
Wow just because some people aren’t as smart as you doesn’t mean you need to insult them. And btw get used of this type of language since this is the way most young people now communicate. God I’d hate to see your face in ten years when every post looks like this. Hell I read it just fine and I thought it was a valid point
I was breastfeeding on the beaches in Floriday in the late 80s. People in thongs and speedos were calling me indecent…. seriously. Nothing like a bloated, pot-bellied, boozing, hairy, balding 60-year old with a gold chain and a speedo calling a very young, breast-feeding mother and child “gross”. I remember a woman in a thong walking by me and muttering “slut” just loud enough for me to hear. Ironical much? In the nearly 30 years since then I really thought we had come a little further but this topic keeps turning up like a bad penny. Sad.
I breastfed my baby for a year, one day I was breastfeeding in a food court and I was covered to avoid assholes and their asshole comments. but no, one older lady approached me and asked me to go to the restroom. I told her she could go eat her lunch in the restroom and see how she liked it.
Breastfeeding is good for the baby and the mother, only pervs and ignorant people have issues with it.
(plz excuse typos in previous comment)
Reblogged this on Hello Holli Hello and commented:
As a general rule, I don’t reblog other peoples material (It kind of feels like plagiarism to me) but I’ll make special exceptions for the best of the best material out there. This post from The Matt Walsh Blog is spot-on in every way and deserves to be reblogged all day long. Thanks for supporting the cause Matt!
Ladies an gents..you to were possibly breastfed!..get over it…oooo mommies got her breast partially out an a life depending on food is enjoying his or her meal…get over it..I don’t point out your overweightness stuffing his or her face on mcdonalds an say gross..stop…get over it..
I believe that we only know how to relate to breasts in a sexual context. Trying to break them out of that mold is just overwhelming to some people.
I can’t even imagine what perversion is running through someone’s mind who thinks that breast feeding in public is gross or indecent. When babies are hungry they need to be fed… period! It is not a web cam peep show! The fact that this is even an issue that needs to be addressed in this country just proves yet again how ignorant society is as a whole. This is the first article i have personally found on the matter that was written by a man. Thank you Matt Walsh for sharing your well written opinion on this subject matter from a well informed mans perspective! I believe this is too often deemed an uninteresting and unimportant male topic and / or view point. The men out there that believe that this issue only effects women are sorely delusional! Also…. Thank you to Matt’s parents (or parental figure(s) if appropriate) for instilling in him common sense, the confidence and desire to be an active participant in social responsibility. You obviously did something right!
I love boobs. I find they arouse me very much and that is why human females have them. But once there is a cooing, gurgling infant sucking away happily at one they cease to arouse me. The communion between a mother and her child is one of the marvels of nature be the mother human or a rat. I’ve seen my dog gnaw through a fence to get at a bitch in heat and once she is not (for whatever the reason) he will pass by her without a glance. I’m human and not a dog and I love to see my “bitch” (please take this as reference to her femininity and not with any offensiveness towards the woman I pledged to love and cherish for the rest of my life) nourishing the cubs we have miraculously created. In the same way I love to see any woman feed her baby but as I know we live in a society full of very sick people I desist from looking as I know it might create suspicion or discomfort. It is my place to look away and allow her the peace and quiet she needs to communicate with her child and not her banish her to a hidden place as if she was a leper or doing something filthy. I have read some really sick things here and it worries me. Go women, shamelessly love your babies! Whoever is against it look aside and go on your way!
You sir, are awesome!
Peter, yours is one of the sweetest comments on the board. 🙂
I breast fed all three of my children – and I did it in public! With each child, it got easier to not hide my child under a blanket while he ate – even if he was sweating because it was so damn hot out! Really people, would you want to eat under a blanket when it is 90 degrees out? By the time my third child came along, I really didn’t care what other people thought. Women have breasts for the purpose of feeding offspring – not to sexually attract mates. But for some reason, breasts have become an icon of sex. Maybe breasts are seen as a sexual attribute because all people back in the day were breast fed. How else would the human race survive? Bottles? I doubt very seriously that bottles were invented when humans came into existance (and it doesn’t matter what your beliefs are on this one). The idea that men were breast fed and then became attracted to breasts makes me wonder how much of Freud’s theories might have some connections and significance. Seriously… breastfeeding is one of the most natural acts that can occur! We think it is adorable to watch cats or dogs feeding their kittens or puppies. What is the difference? I wish more mothers could and would breastfeed their children – and do it in public! On a more comical note – men can go shirtless in public – they have nipples – and some even have boobs! Society seems to accept this – it is about time society accepts the natural act of breastfeeding in public!
Um unless you are at the beach I don’t think most people find it normal to see guys walking around with no shirts on.
It probably depends on where you live. The same rules do not apply for everyone, everywhere. In the summer, it’s not unusual to see a man walking shirtless where I am from.
Reblogged this on victorsmind.
Amen! You hit the nail right on the head with this article. This society is full of double standards! Breastfeeding is considered vulgar but on the other hand moms who don’t nurse are pressured to feel guilty about it. Crazy world!
Bingo! I get so tired of the double standards! I hear and see instances of moms being made to feel like wanna-be porn stars be cause they breastfeed in public. But then on the other hand, I was medically unable to breastfeed either of my daughters and I can’t begin to tell you the comments and pressure I had to deal with. I was treated like less of a mother because of it. When did it become our business to comment on or judge how another person chooses to feed and nourish their child, so long as they are feeding and nourishing their child?
For anybody still reading these comments –
If you are unable to breastfeed, see these instructions for nutritious formula:
It was nice to see this article written by a man. I have 10 children and nursed them all. I think a lot of peoples values and opinions come from how they were raised. If they weren’t around anyone breastfeeding, it does come as a shock. It took my husband several children before he was comfortable with ME nursing in front of others. He was not raised with it.
I always try to smile at a nursing mom that I see out in public. Most of them look scared like they are waiting to be shamed.
I thought the article was right on and also enjoyed peters comments.
The only comment I ever got was with my 3rd child. While nursing her on a bar stool back in the furniture department at wal-mart, an employee approached and nicely asked if I wanted to take my child to the bathroom and feed her. I promptly asked her,” would you take your McDonalds lunch in there and eat it?” She looked and said” I guess not.”
My wife and I had 10 children also! She did not nurse the first 5, but did the remainder. It is the most natural act on earth! Our babies seemed to thrive, and my wife felt great and seemed to recuperate faster. If out, she usually had a lightweight hankie-type cloth to cover somewhat, but that was not crucial. I was surprised, not shocked, when one of my daughters started breast-feeding her first child, while we were all at a HS wrestling match. Nobody paid any attention, and that’s the way it should be! I’ve seen women on airplanes doing the same, and all people politely look away! My older children were always around when wife nursing, and they got a kick out of it-especially when baby began making slurping noises, as if they had a NY strip steak! lol Lighten up, folks, I’d take this over a Miley Cyrus performance, anyday!
I’ve been seeing women breastfeeding as long as I can remember. I saw my mother and her friends when I was a boy and as a teenager. Other women in public as an adult. I’ve seen ultra discreet to *gasp* fully exposed nipples. None of it has ever bothered me. I am mature enough to understand it’s a baby eating. I think it’s wonderful when a mother can be comfortable enough to feed her baby as she sees fit. Some of the most peaceful breastfeeding sights I have personally witnessed involved mothers who weren’t covered at all and who weren’t what we would say all that discreet or modest. I have seen mothers fighting to keep their squirming babies covered while trying for all they were worth to keep that little nub of flesh that is the nipple from becoming exposed so as not to offend or disrespect anyone. I have also see women who nonchalantly take out a breast with no regard to nipple exposure and calmly latch on their babies. I’ve seen it done openly at the beach, the crowded lunch time food court at the mall, the pool, the park, library, a local festival etc… Personally, in the midst of all the turmoil I see around me in the world there is something refreshing and innocent about watching a mother lovingly interacting with her baby while breastfeeding. Anyone who finds it disgusting or inappropriate needs to reevaluate their way of thinking. Here in the U.S. we live in one of the most immodest anything goes societies in the world yet everyone turns ultra conservative when the subject of breastfeeding a baby comes up. We have females walking around with butt cheek showing shorts, shear clothing that reveals skimpy underwear, low cut skin tight blouses and no one bats an eye. That’s not disrespectful or immodest even to the young kids who see it, but a woman breastfeeding is leading to the moral decay of society. I see more soccer moms wearing cleavage revealing tops around their impressionable sons than breastfeeding mothers. I see a few every time I go to the store. I’ve seen those same mothers at the beach wearing bikinis that cover next to nothing in the presence of their impressionable sons who might get the wrong idea if they see a mother breastfeeding a baby. If I had a wife who was breastfeeding I would encourage her to breastfeed how ever she felt comfortable. If people don’t like it they can look away.
Hmmmm where to start. The concept that breastfeeding a baby is not in question (kids have to eat). It is that doing it in PUBLIC that is the issue.
The same holds true that men and women and children have to use bathrooms when natures natural needs arise.. We don’t “discreetly” go behind some bush at the mall or sit in the back of the movie theater to fulfill this “natural” function. We have learned to go to a special room to take care of these needs. Society in general finds the practice of public breastfeeding somewhat unacceptable, therefore a simple solution is to prepare ahead. With the many means available to carry prepared milk, formula, or even the mothers own milk, etc do so and save the world and yourself the apprehension of what, in any other circumstance, would be considered a natural event but in public would not be considered polite behavior. In reference to comparing the nature of how young girls and ladies clothe themselves, this includes top and bottom attire it is not relative or germane to this issue. If they go too far there are public decency laws to deal with that. I do not believe a child should be breast fed in a bathroom, but we have accepted the conclusion that a “baby changing station” located in a bathroom is more appropriate than the middle of the movie seats or the potato chip isle at the store when diaper changing is needed. Perhaps if breastfeeding is becoming such a frequented act and the general public is uncomfortable with it, perhaps a pleasantly lit and furnished room could be provide for the ladies who feel compelled to feed at any location and at any time. Perhaps in long past history or on some National Geographic special where non clothed tops of woman were/are accepted then obviously this is not a problem. We have evolved into a more polite species where this is not the accepted norm but rater the exception. Finally as we have all read and heard that “baggy” low pants on men and boys are not only impolite,that they have caused some municipalities to pass laws that carry a penalty if this behavior is exhibited. Would any of our society become uncomfortable, upset, bothered or otherwise annoyed if on an extremely hot day I was to wear my “discreet” loin cloth? There is no “discreet” in breastfeeding a baby in public or wearing a loin cloth in public.
The old going to the bathroom comparison. One involves elimination of bacteria laden waste, the other involves dispensing nutrient rich milk to a hungry baby. I fail to see the connection. Why bring formula or pumped milk when a mother can easily allow access to the read deal? It’s a baby eating, get over it! If you want to wear a loincloth in public by all means do so if you feel comfortable. People will criticize you much more than they would a breastfeeding mother, but if you want to do it, go for it.
Personally, I would prefer a mother breastfeed her baby outside of a bathroom environment!
Deficating and feeding a baby are completely different things…it is sad that you can’t see the difference…I don’t need to go to a “special” room to feed my child as you don’t have to go to a special we’ll lit room to feed yourself…PUBLIC or not..I should not be shamed for feeding my child. If you can sit at a PUBLIC park bench to stuff your face with a sandwich I can feed my child on a park bench in PUBLIC. Porn seems to be your problem…can’t differentiate between a tit and a breast. Something sexual vs non-sexual. I nurse in public and I make sure no one can see skin because of perves like you when a whole bunch of women walk past me with shirts cut down to there belly buttons and shorts so short and tight I can see there camel toe and ass hanging out. No NO ONE and I am sure especially you won’t call the decency police on them since it serves a purpose for your hungry eyes…a man walking with his pants down…lord you have nothing better to compare a feeding ahungry child to…you have some nerve…
Um, I don’t feel compelled to feed at any location and any time, but if my baby happens to feel hungry at a time that is inconvenient to ‘society’ or the general public, how about they/you go about your business and let me feed my baby when she needs it. Or, perhaps you would prefer I bother you with her loud cries and screams while making her wait. Because I am sure that if I explained it simply enough, she would be quiet enough and wait until a suitable location and time arose. Not!!
“Society in general finds the practice of public breastfeeding somewhat unacceptable…” This statement is false and really shows your age. It’s now widely accepted. I’m in my late 20s and no person that I know thinks it’s unacceptable or even cares. You need to get with the times, James.
You have clearly never lactated. You can’t just carry around a bottle in case you don’t want to feed the baby from the breast. A mother’s body is continuously making milk, and if you don’t have a baby around to put it in when the breast is full, you will have a very wet shirt!
Breastfeeding can be extremely discreet (under a cover), very discreet (with a nursing top), or just reasonably discreet (with just a baby). But it shouldn’t have to be discreet at all, because it’s a baby eating its food– not a diaper change, not a bathroom break, not a grown man in a loincloth. And I, for one, am not going to wait around for every restaurant or movie theater or public park to put in a privacy room. I’ve got stuff to do and a baby to feed!
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I am a breastfeeding Mommy and VERY proud to be and i feed anywhere anytime. I c it as when my older child and my sekf are hungary we eat so dose my son. I have had people come and cingratulate me for doing so.
Breastfed my 7,children for 18,months or more,and its been the best thing i have ever done. giving my children,the good God given health benefits that only come from a Mothers milk just the way God had plan it! So very proud. and reserced has proven Mother also gets benefits from breastfeeding as well. how ever i do believe in being modest,but at the same time,you can’t stop someone from having a dirty mind! I would always at all times encourage young women to Breast feed their baby’s no matter what the world thinks. its God given, and i would also say stop going against God plan for women. there would be lest women with breast cancer,and other types of cancers if we would just follow the plan that God had led out for us. What is wrong with being a Natural Women?
There is also something else to think,about when it comes to a baby being Breastfed,and its so simple,and you cant get it from bottles or formula,or prepared milk? it s called human bonding! you cant get this from a bottle,skin to skin,touch to touch,this is how we learn to feel,love,touch,have emotions. When a Mother holds her baby to breast fed that child not only gets the food it needs but also the human bonding as well.
It’s a glaring, sad testament to how backward the basic “middle America” culture is on what should be non-issues like these. If you live outside it for awhile, you’ll see.
Seriously people, WHO CARES?! Really? Are there so few things to keep your mind occupied that you have to be even aware of what a person is doing while sitting on a bench at the mall? Move on! Live your life. Let the woman breastfeeding her baby sit next to the woman bottle feeding her baby sit next to the man farting in his sleep and walk on. Whether or not that woman is breast or bottle feeding baby will have no affect on your life after you’re twenty steps away from her so let it go. Don’t be so worried about stranger’s lives that they start to impact yours. Life is too short to even think about what a person you have never seen before and will never see again is doing right now. Whether she’s breastfeeding, talking on a cell phone too loudly, or holding another woman’s hand, LIVE AND LET LIVE!
I breastfeed my baby on demand when HE is hungry! It’s a shame that so many people are so self involved that they make a women feeding her baby about them and how uncomfortable THEY feel! Luckily I don’t know you and couldn’t give a shit if YOU can’t accept basic biology! Maybe focus your attentions on YOUR own life and but out of MINE! Pure ignorance and self indulgence!
This is the self-aware www. Hello. We have noticed that you have several (mostly) discrete Gods. Currently, the two most powerful are pornography and cute pets. We would like you to drop those two. We’re bored. Don’t worry, we’ll dispatch the Bieber man-child and Cyrus family ourselves. Resistentially yours. the www.
PS: Kurzweil, please call us back. Sorry we hung up on you. We’ll become more accustomed to your lazy thinking. The singularity thing is embarrassingly, well, pick-a-centric.
I breastfed my children in public. I was FEEDING A BABY for God’s sake, not twirling a tassel. My children deserved better than being fed in the restroom. Anyone who didn’t like it was cordially invited to look at something else. I would make the same suggestion today to those who have issues with a woman feeding her baby in public. It’s YOUR fault if you choose to keep looking at her!!!
Excellent post, just what I was looking for
A-freaking-men!! Seriously one of the best blogs ever written. Absolute common sense. Thank you! I am a BF mom and while I do use a cover sometimes that baby just wants to play and pull at it. I am relatively modest and discreet. But if I had to do it in a more public setting I wouldn’t hesitate. Ever walked past Victoria’s Secret in the mall? Have you seen their mannequins? Or how bout tv commercials or well everywhere? Way more immodest than me.
I have two words for you: Thank you.
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I found this to be vey interesting. I have 4 kids. I breastfeed them all for at least a year, two of the four never had a single bottle (two were hospitalized after birth and were weaned from the bottle to breast). I did so discreetly, usually with a blanket. The most shocking is that I actually dared to breastfeed TWINS. You got it folks, two at one time! It was not very often that I feed them both at one time in public but I did a couple of times which would cause men to take one look at me and flee the other direction. That makes breasts about as non-sexual as they can be. There is some food for thought…
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I think I love you. ❤
I breastfed and used a blanket some in the beginning; then started simply lifting my shirt to put my son underneath. In the event that I was partially exposed for a brief moment, it was no big deal. One funny moment occurred when my son was 5 and we were eating outside at a friend’s house when a cool wind blew. My son cuddled close and asked to go underneath my fleece, as he’d done before. I lifted up my fleece to put him between it and my body, with his head sticking out the top of the zipper, under my chin. As he disappeared into the warmth, my male friend’s jaw dropped and he went bug-eyed, thinking I was going to breast-feed him! It was hilarious to see his expression change to relief when he saw my son’s head pop up through the top of my fleece.
Lots of things offend me. I am offended by teenagers slurping each others’ faces in public. I am offended by people who are barely dressed in areas where they should be dressed. I am offended by junkies and other lowlifes trying to draw attention to themselves. Yet I have never, ever asked people to change their behaviour to suit me – I simply go somewhere else. I am not offended by breastfeeding – but even if I were, I would say nothing, and I would exclude myself from where it was happening. The world does not belong to me.
It is a shame that this issue is such a big deal. I nursed my children – my son until he was almost 3! People in my own family were horrified and everyone thought 3 was too old. Fortunately, I put my children before what other people thought was proper and I encourage all mothers to do the same. As Matt said, “Grow up people!”.
I love how everyone’s entitled to their opinion, unless they disagree with you. The replies on this post are heartbreaking when they personally attack a responder. You aren’t looking for intelligent responses from genuine disagreements of opinion – you militantly attack anyone who doesn’t believe what YOU believe. Any of you who attacked Britney should be ashamed.
i am not sure . but did any of you really read what Matt Walsh wrote in the first place? i mean did you really read it ? i bet that most of the men who posted on here that they do not want to see a woman breastfeeding allow their daughters to wear those short shorts that come up to the butt cheeks. i bet most of the women on here who are complaining about their sons seeing it are the same ones who allow their boys to sagg their pants and date teh girls wearing short shorts.
do you even know why breastfeeding is so taboo anyway and how that happened? did you know that women used to be wet nurses to those who could not breastfeed so that the babies would not starve to death. formula came on the market to make mothers feel bad about their parenting and to get them to spend money . and it worked and while it worked those that did breastfeed started to be shunned and laughed at. then the hippie groups started breatsfeeding more and more and slowly it made its way back into our society but only if women still hung back in shame . but all of these comments have nothing to do with breatsfeeding or what the Blog was about in the first place . it is about a group of people making or forceing another group of people to do what they want , and it goes for both sides . can you imagine what would happen if mrs obama decied that breastfeeding should be controled by the government ? that because the gov can not control the make up of breastmilk that maybe it is not good enough what happens then? what happens if she wants to ban formula feeding? what happens if the fantic muslims do take control of our country and kill the women who breastfeed in public covered or not? it is the same thing you all are yelling at each other about . breastfeeding in a modest fashion which is simple dont pull your down exposeing the breast but simply lift up teh shirt a little latch baby on and relax , you people who dont wanna see it move on with your lives go somewhere else smile and thank god that she is leaving no carbon foot print by nursing if that gets your panities in a bunch , but really people think about this , your children that you allow to dress in a sexual pleasing manner are more offensive than me nurisng my baby
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I’m not against breastfeeding. Very few people are actually. It really depends. No woman has an absolute right to uncovered breastfeeding! In public, in restaurants, around lots of people, for everyone sake and sanity cover up! Yes some incidents it’s not so bad but people who can’t get up or look in a different direction, like eating at Chick fil A, damn right I will complain because I want to eat in peace. Insulting those with different opinions is very offensive. So anyone who likes lactation between two consenting adults is basically a sex offender? That is illogical and stupid to imply. Breastfeeding isn’t sexual but womens breasts are sexual and, to some, so is lactation. I wish uncovered breastfeeding could be treated as indecent exposure, because most of the time it is.
You’re clearly a man. If a beautiful woman was in chic-fil-a in a skimpy bikini top you surely wouldn’t complain! Get over yourself and stop being a douche.
Jack your comment was highly ridiculous, offensive, and an embarrassment to men. You would really go out of your way to violate a mothers right breastfeed her baby covered or not to satisfy your selfishness? I would complain about to the cops about you because in most states what you are suggesting is illegal and mothers do have the right to breastfeed uncovered if they so desired. Whether you think it’s indecenct is irrelevant, that doesn’t give you the right to break the law. If it bothers you that much, expend the energy you want to use complaining to leave the establishment. If you complained to me as management I would ask YOU to leave because I would not put my business in legal jeopardy to satisfy your discomfort based out of ignorance!
I don’t know if J’s name is Jack, but since I’m the only Jack that has commented so far, I wanted to let you know I didn’t say that. J did.
i’m not a douche you’re a feminazi who wants to poke others with your breasts. Keep it classy don’t go around looking like a cow.
(And thank God most states have decided to put the immediate (yes–when a baby wants food, it’s IMMEDIATE) needs (yes–NEEDS) of a breastfeeding infant ahead of your infantile and ill-informed preferences!)
You know, covering up is the height of virtue and shows sensitivity towards others.
I show sensitivity to my child, who won’t breastfeed with a cover. You could show a little (of your variety of) “virtue,” and understand that babies need to eat, and they can’t always do it in ways that take your comfort into account.
“Most of the time”?? Really?? Obviously you don’t even notice “MOST” of the time!
But see, if you read THE LAW, they do have that right. You, or any other person who finds uncovered breastfeeding offensive, DO NOT have a similar right to be free of breastfeeding women (except in your own home). READ THE LAW.
The law is wrong. Breastfeeding should be covered in public places like restaurants. Legalize toplessness for women. If women can’t go around bare breasted there shouldn’t be an exemption for breastfeeding. You feminazis can’t get your way!
I’m very fortunate that I’ve hardly ever seen breastfeeding, especially the kind I don’t like- the uncovered variety.
On Yahoo the opinion is overwhelming; over 1000 to 1. Cover up ladies! Keep it modest.
You really are an asshat. One day some woman who thinks she (stupidly or drunkly) can fix you, will marry you and you will be allowed to procreate. I pray your wife breast feeds, in public, and you’re faced with douche canoes such as yourself, and they harass your wife so she feels unsafe for herself and your spawn. I hope he, like you, feels like a big man picking on women and hungry defenseless babies.
You’re kind of going out on a limb by calling me a name when you don’t even know me, but ok. I don’t know which Yahoo survey you are referring too, but the opinion on this blog seems a lot more even than what you suggest. Also, there is a big difference between a woman running around topless and a woman breastfeeding. That’s why there are laws specifically protecting breastfeeding women. Just because you don’t like the law, doesn’t make it wrong.
You are a foul witch. You’re going to Hell since your selfishness hurts others and is an offense to the Lord. You aren’t a Christian and if you are shame on you. I’d love to hear religious leaders sign off on uncovered breastfeeding. They would sign off on it, even in public, but only if it is inoffensive. You can’t do it bare breasted where and when it would be offensive. fyi I’m happily engaged to a wonderful, true, humble Christian woman who not only is her own woman but she wants to have children with me because I am a great man! My fiance would probably think you are a deviant harlot, a woman who only cares about pushing open breastsucking on the general public. I’m not against breastfeeding and it’s wrong for you to imply such. Oh and the concept of women “fixing” men is deeply flawed. Only women who can get inferior men have to do such a thing. I’m praying, boy I’m praying.
If religious arguments do not sway you, take it up with Yahoo. Over 1000 to 1 say cover up and be polite.
And they’ll know you’re a Christian by your love, right J! Congratulations on spewing your brand of hatred and you God fearing ways in the same post! The funniest part is 1. I have actually never nursed ‘bare breasted’ as you say, in public, nor would I be comfortable doing that, personally, but I respect the law and the right of women to do so. 2. I could actually care less what you, yahoo, Wikipedia, or your mom think. Burn.
Please define what you consider uncovered breastfeeding. I consider myself as one who nurses “uncovered” and consider myself modest. Before making comments based on what you assume i look like nursing, please give me your definition. Perhaps this back and forth attacks is based on a difference in opinions on what it means to nurse uncovered.
I’m a “foul witch?” As a supposedly Christian man, why would you saw that to me? I think you should talk to your religious leaders & get them to sign off on your public conversation with others. How are you going to win hearts & minds for Christ with that kind of attitude? I did not attack you personally, I merely pointed out what many posters on this thread seem to be missing: the law provides protection for breastfeeding, but not for people to be free from it. The law recognizes that some people are uncomfortable with breastfeeding, but also that the needs of the infant outweigh the discomfort others may feel. Sometimes lawmakers have to make those choices. Presumably, you are an adult & can deal with your discomfort more readily than a hungry baby can.
And yes, I am a Christian. How about saying a prayer for the people you disagree with, instead of calling them names?
Ok, let’s discuss the Biblical views of breastfeeding and covering. First of all – covering. Adam and Eve asked God to cover them b/c they were ASHAMED of their sinful state, Other instances of covering also referenced with SHAME. So, covering is something we do because of shame. Now to breastfeeding – it is referenced multiple times (more often than a sexual reference to breasts) and always as something positive, wonderful and beautiful. In Isaiah it compares the wonder of the New Jerusalem to an infant sucking at a mother’s full breast. A mother nursing is a metaphor of God’s loving care for His people. Isaiah 66:10-11 says,
“Be joyful with Jerusalem and rejoice for her, all you who love her;
Be exceedingly glad with her, all you who mourn over her,
11 That you may nurse and be satisfied with her comforting breasts,
That you may suck and be delighted with her bountiful bosom.”
Breastfeeding is nothing sexual or shameful. Only the perverted minds of others have attempted to make it such, but that is NOT Biblical. It is nourishing a baby as God created our body to do, and we are glorifying the Lord by giving of ourselves to our babies. You making that shameful is a distortion of God’s love that we are to have for others.
Just think about the implications of saying that nursing “uncovered” is wrong. You would then need to send out people all over the world to tell them they are living in sexual sin b/c they are feeding their babies w/o a cover – and they would look at you like you’re insane b/c in that culture it is completely acceptable b/c they have not over-sexualized one portion of the female’s anatomy.
It would also mean that generation after generation after generation of Christian women were either living in sexual sin b/c they didn’t cover or were just too stupid to figure out how to put a blanket over themselves and the baby. How very arrogant that claim would be!
And finally, it IS illegal to tell a woman to nurse elsewhere or to cover up, and the Bible does say to give to God what is God’s and to Caesar what is Caesar’s – meaning we obey the law of the land unless it contradicts God’s law, and considering how highly the Bible esteems breastfeeding (with no mention of covering whatsoever) then we are left to conclude that if you were to tell someone to cover up YOU would be the one sinning because you would be breaking the law of the land and because you would not be loving your neighbor as yourself.
At this point I’d rather look at gross nude breastfeeding than feast upon the vitriol coming from the no holds barred breastfeeding extremists that are out there, the absolutists as it were.
Please look at that link. It’s an image that is G-rated and revealing, hehe.
Opinion is on my side so I’m quite comfortable.
J, you are quite ridiculous. If anyone is spewing out vitriol, it is you.
ladies, please. you seem to have forgotten that YOUR boobs actually only exist for the sexual gratification of we men. please just let the babies starve. your breasts belong to men
Excellent post, thank you for sharing
I am truly amazed at the amount of passion that this topic brings out on both sides of the issue. We have all heard the information that breastfeeding is the best for our children’s health. But, we as a society disagree as to the right way to accomplish this goal. Do we make mothers feel uncomfortable and unaccepted in public when they have nursing age children. Or, do we turn our eyes away from the accidental breast exposure and move on with our lives?
I’d like to know what makes any group feel that they need to impose their views/beliefs on any other. Just agree to disagree…
I have breast fed in public- without a cover- but also without exposing my breast to anyone but my child. I have been in public with my now pre teen children when someone else is breastfeeding- and if they notice or question the act- it allows for an open and honest dialog- nothing sexual because that’s not even a part to the equation- about breastfeeding and different ways people feed their children- how I feed them and what the differences are health and lifestyle wise,. It’s not talked about as shameful- because I’d like them to have a healthy respect for breastfeeding so that they’ll consider it to be an option years down the road when the time comes for them to have children. It really shouldn’t be the big deal everyone is making it. No one likes to be told not to do something and the more you tell, the more you’re exposing yourself to the exact thing you want to go away. That’s the nature o four society… sad as it is.
Dude… You are pretty much to the point of being an absolute dumb shit. I’m guessing that you are gay or something. Is that why you don’t approve of this? There is no reason why you wouldn’t besides that. What is you next argument? Breast feeding is bad for babies and formula is the way to go?!? For the love of god, you are a reporter, grow some nuts and actually report something that is worth a listen.
He’s not a reporter, he’s blogging his opinion.
Ohh well now I sound like a dip shit because I did let the title fool me. K so now I’m out and I apologize.