Monthly Archives: March 2013

When the news broke that Cyprus would be seizing assets from bank accounts to bail itself out, most Americans immediately asked two question: What the hell is Cyprus? Is it a brand of dish washing detergent? Meanwhile the minority of … Continue reading →

Here’s my impression of myself at a four way stop: Me to other car: Hmm, it appears we are in quite a quandary. I believe I pulled up a split second before you, but you are to my right, which … Continue reading →

The DHS has increased its email surveillance, all while continuing to hoard enough ammo to murder everyone on the planet twice. This is the part where intelligent Americans begin to feel slight unease at the fact that an ambiguous and … Continue reading →

I read the story about the principal in Massachusetts who upset some parents by trying to “include everyone” in his school’s Honor’s Awards ceremony by canceling the traditional exclusive evening dinner and celebration. He replaced it with an assembly in … Continue reading →

I think it’s hilarious when American politicians go to the Middle East to try and help solve their problems. Really, contemplate the irony here. Our leaders can’t even balance a checkbook or come to a consensus on how to cut … Continue reading →

Dear People Who Leave Their Shopping Carts in the Middle of the Parking Lot, I don’t mean to trouble you. Obviously you’re very busy. I mean, you had time to get a load of groceries but you simply can’t afford … Continue reading →

Something horrible happened in New Jersey (sorry for being redundant). A father posted a picture on Facebook of his son holding his new rifle. GASP. HORROR. I mean, I can’t believe these people could be so reckless. A child isn’t … Continue reading →

Exciting news, everyone! Mayor Bloomingturd in New York has decided on his Nanny State Crusade of the Week! Fresh off of his failed attempt to ban large sodas, and a few days after launching a taxpayer funded campaign to get … Continue reading →

If your mother dies and you are sad, according to the psychiatric community you suffer from a temporary “mental disorder” called Bereavement. If you are sad for a long time, you have a mental disease called Acute Stress Disorder. But … Continue reading →