Monthly Archives: November 2012

BREAKING NEWS: Reports Indicate Everything in Existence Can Kill You

The media might as well just run with that headline. It’s technically true and since the only journalistic goal of every news outlet on the planet is to gin up phony outrage and unwarranted hysteria, it gets the job done … Continue reading

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Bless us O Lord and these thy gifts, NOW GIVE ME AN iPHONE

As you may have heard, Black Friday has officially slithered its slimy consumerist tentacles backwards through time and latched onto Thursday, turning what was once regular old Be-With-Your-Loved-Ones-Thanksgiving into Screw-You-Loved-Ones-We’ve-Got-Crappy-Plastic-Toys-to-Buy-Thanksgiving. Several major retailers are opening at 8pm or 9pm on … Continue reading

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Farewell, Ron Paul

Ron Paul delivered his final speech on the House floor yesterday. I watched the video and read the transcript. I thought it had the same tone, scope and depth of George Washington’s farewell address in 1796. In fact, Paul is … Continue reading

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Bankrupted Nation Faces Possibility of Bankruptcy

Obama wants 1.6 trillion dollars in new revenue to avoid going over the “fiscal cliff”. Fantastic idea, Barry. You want to raise money to take care of the debt you and your predecessors created? No problem. So when’s the bake … Continue reading

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A Succession of Secession Suggestions, But Will They Succeed in Seceding?

 As you may have heard, thousands of people from almost every state in the country have sent petitions to the White House asking for permission to secede from the Union.  According to the President’s own rules, once a petition garners … Continue reading

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The Silent Plight of the Satirist

I’m glad I don’t write for The Onion. Our fearless leaders are making it very hard on people who are in the business of parody.   After all, how in the hell do you satirize this? How do you make … Continue reading

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